Divorces are stressful and can cause all sorts of emotional and physical problems ranging from headaches, anxiety, depression, panic attacks, and other health issues not to mention the potential financial costs of a divorce.

Anger and disappointment are common feelings that can arise during divorce negotiations. Many times the parties have a hard time communicating with each other about settling divorce issues such as division of property, child custody, visitation and spousal and child support issues. Besides seeking the support of family, friends and profession advice, a number of couples are opting for divorce mediation to resolve their divorce issues in order to avoid the stress of a costly and lengthy divorce trial.

What is a mediator?

A mediator is a neutral third party that assists parties in settling any unresolved issued during the divorce. The mediator may or may not be an attorney.  The important thing to remember when hiring a mediator is that you want someone who has experience in mediating divorces. While mediation is less expensive than going to trial, mediator services vary so it is a good idea to interview a few mediators and then choose the one that you think is best suited for the job.

How Does Mediation Work?

The initial consultation meeting with the mediator is held at the mediator\’s office . At the initial meeting, the mediator will explain the mediation process and have both parties sign a mediation agreement. If you are represented by our own family law attorney, you can consult with the attorney. Anything that you say in mediation is kept confidential and does not get included in the public court records. Typically, the two parties share the costs of the mediation fee. Any variations can be decided by the parties on their own.

The mediator acts as a facilitator to try and help the parties resolve their divorce issues. The mediator does not decide or rule on the issues like a judge. It is up to the parties themselves to come to an agreement. The mediator will help by making suggestions or helping the parties determine if additional information needs to be provided by one of the parties.  Mediation may involve more than one session if the parties are unable to decide all the issues at one time.   Mediation works best when the parties are open to suggestions and compromise. So mediation may not be for everyone, especially if one party is hostile towards the other party or the parties refuse to speak to one another.


Once the parties have reached a negotiated settlement, the mediator can draw up the settlement agreement for the parties. If both parties are represented by attorneys, then it is a good idea for each party to have their respective attorney review the agreement before they sign it.

Why Choose Mediation?

Understanding how mediation works is important because it also explains why more couples choose mediation over going to trial.  Mediation is quicker, less expensive and private.  There is no stress of having to face a judge in a formal courtroom setting and talk about your personal financial issues and your personal family life. Whatever is said at mediation, stays at mediation. It is confidential, unlike a court hearing where testimony is put into public record and anyone can come in and sit down and listen to you and soon to be ex-spouse fighting over your divorce issues. You have control over decisions without the court intervening.

The courts favors divorce mediation and often times will order divorcing parties to attend mediation before a permanent hearing date can be set.

If you are contemplating a divorce or having trouble settling divorce issues with your spouse, mediation might be the best choice for you and your spouse to settle your divorce issues in a more amicable fashion and can save you money and time.


Virginia Robbins is a family law attorney located in Parker, Colorado. Ms. Robbins limits her law practice to family law and mediation. For a free consultation please call 720.617.2623 or send an email to robbinslawfirmllc@gmail.com for more information.


Contact a Douglas County & Parker Divorce Attorney at Robbins Law Firm LLC

For experienced, effective representation in Colorado divorce, contact a Douglas County & Parker divorce attorney at Robbins Law Firm LLC.

At Robbins Law Firm LLC, our attorney and her dedicated staff are focused on providing our clients with superior representation while preserving their rights and advancing interests in divorce cases, as well as other important family legal matters.

To find out more about your best options for resolving your divorce, set up a meeting with our lawyer today. You can schedule this initial consultation by calling 720.617.2623 or by emailing us via the contact form on this page. Evening appointments are available upon request.